X Factor

Friday before Christmas and the bookies have closed the book on who will be the Christmas number 1. Shayne Ward, winner of the X-Factor 2005, was last quoted at 100/1 ON to knock Nizlopi off the number one spot.

I've long campaigned for the removal of these talentless nobodies off British TV, but unfortunately, the growth in TV channels leaves a talent vacuum that must be filled from somewhere, and cheap numpties from nowhere are as good an option as any.

I'm not against the principal of TV talent shows, it's a tried and trusted formula and very reminiscent of how the music industry finds talent behind closed doors.

It's just the row after row of lookalikes, wanabees and backing artists all of whom have been doing the rounds for years and it's their lifelong ambition to be a professional singer.

Here's a wake up call for you, if it's so much your ambition and you're sooooooo talented, then surely you would have made it by now.

Or maybe you aren't good enough.

Then there's the Big Brother contestants suddenly being classed as celebrities. As though wanting to be famous, and being prepared to do almost anything to be famous, automatically makes you a celebrity. Idiots. Them for doing it, us for watching them.