Britain's Got Talent

Just to prove that the barrel still hasn't been fully scraped away at the bottom, comes another series of Britain's Got Talent.

Last weekend saw such talent as a bigoted toady a**e-licker, a music impresario famous only for his inability to dress properly and a slapper more known for cheating on her husband with her co-stars than anything she's actually been in herself. Go on, name one thing Amanda Holden's actually been in, apart from Neil Morrissey's pants.

I know it's easy for me to knock these people without having the guts to do it myself. I know it's easy, so I will.

More and more people with 'life long' ambitions to perform on stage, impervious to the fact that if they were any good, they'd have fulfilled their 'life long' ambition way before they'd become impervious to their own complete lack of ability.

Just what this country needs, more talentless nobodies.

Garbage.

But at least it's better than the 'I'd do anything' s***e on the BBC.