Lessons learnt

So after three years, we've finally managed to get out of the s**t-hole that is the Third division. The novelty lasted for about two weeks back in the heady days of 2005 before Tuesday night games away at the likes of Port Vale started becoming a regularity. So what have we learnt from those three years ?

We had to care about the FA Cup First Round draw

There's a company called Johnstone's that make paint, apparently

Week in, week out, tin-pot nobodies would choose to use the vast expanse of the City Ground playing surface by only playing on half of it, defending in numbers & nicking an annoying winning goal on the break

Opposition fans chanting "you're not famous any more" every single f***ing week is neither funny nor original

Except from Huddersfield fans, when the irony was lost, especially by themselves

The knowledge that even by giving away fans 5,000 tickets in the best area of our ground, we knew full well that in the return fixture we'd get 150 tickets located in a hastily erected shed at the cold end of some local park

There's a professional football team in Cheltenham

And Hartlepool

And Accrington

And in bl***y Weymouth, of all places

Referees at Third Division level are there for a reason. They're bobbins.

You get exactly zero coverage from the national newspapers, except when they run "Where did it all go wrong" or "Forest players out on the p**s again" stories.

It's no fun being in a lower league to Scunthorpe.

Or Colchester.

Or Leicester. Oh, hang on, scrub that last one.

Our groundsman is the best in the country again. That's because our pitch is in such pristine condition. That's because in the Third Division, nobody uses the grassy bit.

It's c**p, and if we never play at that level again, it'll be too soon.