Preston v Forest FA Cup

Bit of a strange day out, this one. Still suffering the effects of chronic man-flu, an early morning taxi to stand out in the cold of The Spot’s car park wasn’t top of my list of things I’d rather be doing of a Saturday morning, but the reward was the promise of a decent coach trip to an away game rather than the vacuous geriatric experience of the official coaches. Two and a half hours of the ‘Inbetweeners’ coupled with a DIY bottle of vodka and lemonade before we arrived at our drinking destination. This was the first difference to the official journey, as they usual spend their hour stop off in some dry non-descript motorway service station. The pub was going to have food laid on for us as well as extra staff for the coach-load of eager drinkers. And I’m sure that pub did, just not the pub we turned up at. “Has it been done up ?”, someone asked; “Is the bowling green still round the back ?”, asked another, to a negative response. Oops. Never mind, they served beer, tick, food for those that wanted it, tick, and live football. Tick. Is there such a thing as the “wrong pub” ? Maybe not. The Grapes in Wrea Green, certainly not the “wrong pub”.

The game itself was pretty poor. The last time I went to Deepdale, three sides looked ok, while the stand we stood in was scheduled for demolition, seemingly while we were in it. The new stand that has replaced it seems half finished, and for a team of Preston’s rich heritage, remarkably tiny. A single tiered half stand, with some executive boxes at the back, topped off with a concrete shell for that added ‘unfinished’ effect. Preston took the lead towards the end of the first half, by which time Forest seemed to have given up bothering. A half time drink just finished in time to see Paul Anderson equalise straight after the break, Lewis McGugan mis-controlling from six yards when hitting it first time was surely the better option, before Luke ‘BetterThanKelvinWilson’ Chambers stabbed home the winner in the last minute. The Preston fans reacted as if they knew this was coming, and went home quietly.

Party time on the coach home, some memory inducing cans of McEwan’s Export purchased to assist the journey home. That was the plan. A phone call 10 minutes into the journey home revealed my bag had been taken by mistake and I was left with a female’s overnight bag. I didn’t look into it, but was pretty sure pants & a toothbrush were more likely to be found within than four more cans of McEwan’s Export. Ah well, all adds to the story for years to come. And I won the first goal scorer sweep, so not all bad. LuckyCol continues on into the New Year.

A few of Alcazar’s finest enjoyed in a surprisingly packed Fox & Crown late on Saturday night rounded off an enjoyable day all round.

I’ll be using the coach again, no doubt, enjoy the mystery tour of pubs along the way, but I’ll make sure I label my bag better in future.

Or change my name to Mr Adidas.

Ken Bates definately still not bitter, honest

From the BBC:

Gillingham chairman Paul Scally has hit out at Ken Bates after comments from his Leeds counterpart ahead of United's 2-1 win against the relegated Gills.

Bates said sending them down would be "poetic justice" because Scally backed a decision to dock Leeds 15 points.

Good to see Leeds United still aren't bitter about this, especially since they were quoted on Thursday as saying, in their official response to the 15 point ruling:

The matter is now closed and the focus can return to the pitch.

I don't mind which of Carlise (nice town, well worth a weekend visit if you've never been), Doncaster (fans deserve it after their years of club mismanagement) or Southend (easy six points) go up in the play-offs, so long as Leeds's punishment is completed.

I'll never complain about the British legal system ever again.

So, after all the hot-air coming out of Yorkshire, Leeds fail in their ill-timed attempt to get back the 15 points they themselves agreed to have taken off them at the start of the season.

Obviously this is bad news for the decent Leeds supporters out there, so commiserations go to the pair of them.

To the rest of the neanderthal, shell-suit wearing, pound shop dwelling, cousin marrying yokels from up the M1, and especially their adopted chairman, Ken 'electrocute supporters' Bates, I wish nothing more than contempt.

The Football League has proved that you progress through fair play, both on AND off the pitch. That a team of accountants might be able to drive a bus through an existing loop-hole, but actually, you know what, if it isn't fair and if the overwhelming majority of chairman agree, it won't be allowed to stand.

And so it was that Leeds cheated their creditors, cheated their fans at the end of last season and then tried to cheat the rest of the football league.

Fortunately, they got caught, and they got punished.

If they gain promotion through the play-offs, then fair play to them. Personally, I hope they don't, but that's because I don't like a disproportionally high percentage of their animalistic 'fans'.

But what you have to remember is that far from taking their punishment like men, they cried and whimpered and begged and attempted to cheat some more, all while buying players with money that should have been used to pay back some of their less wealthy creditors in the first place.

It should be Dirty Mardy Cheating Leeds.

Get out of jail free

This man is officially the luckiest man on the planet.

Even he can't f**k it up from here, surely.

Not only does he get the sort of reprieve usually reserved for men thirsty enough to stop off at the Nags Head, he then later admits he wasn't even watching the Israel game at the time of their winning goal, he was in the bathroom.

Presumably raking through the medicine cabinet.

His job would have been hanging from a thread if, had results gone the wrong way, the Scots had qualified on Saturday and Russia had won through.

How unimaginably smug & bitter & twisted & full of gloat filled loathing would the Jocks have been then ?

But, and there was a time when I would have been disappointed in this, who cares that Scotland didn't get through ?

Poor refereeing decisions for both sides don't make you unlucky, being s**t means you don't qualify. Had the decisions gone correctly, Scotland would have had a last minute free-kick, on their own goal line, facing a two goal deficit, rather than stumbling towards a completely undeserved draw.

They were s**t in qualifying for EURO 2000, s**t in qualifying for the World Cup in 2002, s**t in qualifying for EURO 2004, s**t in qualifying for the World Cup in 2006 and they were s**t in qualifying this time round.

Georgia FFS. Get over it, Alex.

Lincoln 1:1 Forest

A proper Saturday away game done in the proper way.

In the old days, an away game wouldn't have been the same without getting up early on the Saturday morning with raging hang-over. Old age might have stopped the 3am clubbing experience (ok, maybe not stopped, but it's not EVERY weekend any more) so a more gentile night was spent in the company of a very old friend, The Beechdale.

It's been a few years since I've been in, and it's changed a touch since then, but it's still the same place. 21 years since I first started working there, the memories are still fresh, the Smoking Room, the old dart board, pints of mix, a beef salad cob at lunch-time, towels in the pool table pockets, cheap chips on the way home, good old days.

As an aside, since the smoking ban has come into force in England, my hang-overs have all been considerably reduced. Were my old hang-overs the result of passive nicotine withdrawal ? Mmmmmmmm ..........

So, up on Saturday morning with a touch of a hang-over, easily cured with a sausage, egg & cheese cob at home, and a couple of cans of gassy lager on the train to Lincoln. Sorted.

Lincoln may only be 50 miles away, but judging by the number of police waiting for what was a scheduled train, you'd have thought we'd gone back in time to the bad old days of trouble in the 80's. One officer was clearly on holiday, capturing the moment on his camcorder, while another was dressed for cross-country skiing.

Because we knew that local meatheads would want to shake hands with equally gifted intellectuals from Newark, we decided to get a taxi up the hill and start the days drinking in a quieter part of town. (Thanks to the Lincoln CAMRA web site for the information)

The Victoria is a cracking little pub, real ale and real floor-boards, all housed in an old red-brick coach house near the castle.

Just round the corner to The Strugglers, an award winning place with a real (ok, gas) fire and a good choice of beer.

Along a bit to the Tower Hotel, a more modern place, laminate flooring instead of the old floorboards, but very comfy leather sofas.

From then on the pubs (literally) went a little bit downhill. The Lion & Snake was a little bit too Weatherspoons-ish for my liking,

while the Magna Carta was nice looking outside, but too false inside.

A bit of walk down through the shopping area to the Treaty of Commerce for a quick one before a walk to the ground.

I've been to Sincil Bank several times, but never for a competitive game (it has been 50 years after all !!!). Having bummed my way round a few Scottish Third division grounds, it's of a similar vein, one decent stand, one small stand for your directors and a couple of cheap concrete ends.

The game itself was mostly one way, Forest having ALL the possession for the first 10 - 15 minutes in front of 2,500 very vocal travelling supporters. When McGugan put Forest in front from close range, it was no more than we deserved.

The stats will say that Lincoln didn't manage a single shot on target all game, and in this instance the stats don't lie. Yet the most important stat of the day will dictate that Forest & Lincoln will have to replay a fortnight on Tuesday because Kelvin Wilson is too clumsy to either get his leg out of the way facing the wrong way in his own box or incapable of kicking a ball upwards.

Junior Agogo missed the target when clean through and Kris Commons could have won it with a shot from 40 yards out that cannoned off the bar. Anyone else would have made the effort to get nearer to goal, but the smell of pies from the small directors stand pulled him back.

The game ground to an inevitable draw as Forest, as they are prone to do, failed to break down a ten man defence of a poorer side.

Outside the ground to be greeted by even more of her majesty's finest, firstly blocking the road to the station before letting only a certain number of people through, and then excelling themselves with their desire to stop people sitting where they liked on trains.

A quick one in Foreman's before going home & putting our feet up to watch the best comedy currently on the BBC, Match of the Day.

I stand corrected

I always have a bet with my Blackburn Rovers supporting friend that they will finish in the bottom half of the table.

Last season I lost the bet.

I don't like Blackburn Rovers, but apparently, according to the Telegraph, I should.

There's me thinking Blackburn were a dirty, clueless, clogging, long-ball rag-tag band of injury-prone misfits playing in front of half a dozen in-bred northerners too stupid to watch attractive football anywhere else in Lancashire who somehow managed to fluke a top half finish last season,

when, in fact

they are a dirty, clueless, clogging, long-ball rag-tag band of injury-prone misfits playing in front of half a dozen in-bred northerners too stupid to watch attractive football anywhere else in Lancashire who have somehow managed to fluke a top five position on the back of catching Tottenham on a bad day.

I stand corrected.

Forest 0:0 Dullcaster

Playing catch up a little bit with this for two reasons; one, I've been away from my computer and two, I've only just woken up since watching this game.

Not strictly fair because, as nil nil draws go, this was up there with similar nil nil draws like, ............ erm, ................ hang on I'm sure I'll remember one in a minute.

Doncaster stuck ten men behind the ball and one up front, but they broke quickly and efficiently and could have won the game in the second half. Forest reverted to last seasons vintage of not being able to break down a poor third division side, a worrying habit that doesn't look like it's gone away. Any scouts watching the game would have come away with a blue-print of exactly how to guarantee leaving Trentside with at least a point.

A loss at the weekend to a decent (at home at least) Luton side was a knock-back, but worse was the poor performance. Again.

Nothing less than three wins from the up coming three home league games will be enough.

Punishing

From the BBC:

Ministers rule out smacking ban. A complete ban on smacking has been rejected by ministers, after a review suggested most parents opposed one.

Clearly there are better ways of disciplining kids than by physical methods.

You could threaten to buy them a season-ticket at the Reebok.